Monday, February 20, 2012
Thinking back to our own childhoods, both of us remember something called “the look.” “The Look” was usually on your mother’s face and it conveyed a message of complete dissatisfaction with what you were wearing, doing, or where you were going.
As educated grandparents and parents, we think that our expressions are neutral. In reality, our feelings are visible and readily obvious to our children and grandchildren. We are often unaware that a raised eyebrow, a shrug of a shoulder, a deep sigh, or looking the other way can show displeasure.
Conversely, our children often respond non-verbally as well. Their reactions to us might include rolling their eyes, shuffling their feet, or reading a text message, which indicates their impatience and annoyance. These gestures replace unkind words or, often, too many words. Could this be a good communication strategy?
Even when we try to “zip it,” our body language often shows our true feelings, to which we are entitled. Body language can be used to communicate positive unspoken feelings as well as the negative ones. A huge smile, a hug, a slight nod or a touch or squeeze of a hand, speak volumes.
Tell us what you think!
Ann and Sue
Monday, February 13, 2012
When your children were younger, many of you participated in a group for single parents at Central Synagogue with Ann Obsatz. Now that your children are older, many of their needs have changed, as have yours.My partner Sue Bayer and I are forming a group specifically to address the needs of parenting without a partner. Sharing experiences and concerns, we will seek alternatives to stressful daily challenges and be there to support each other.Please join us for the first discussion, by invitation only:"As Single Parents Talk"Date: Monday, March 12, 2012Time: 6:00 PM - 7:30 PMPlace: Home of Sue Bayer
Stonehenge 360 East 65th St. Apt.11FWe hope you will join us for fun, food, wine and good conversation!Please RSVP to Ann Obsatz at 212-861-6522or e-mail Ann at email@example.com e-mail firstname.lastname@example.org
Monday, February 6, 2012
After running our first successful group for grandparents, we realized that many of the issues that arose were not issues between the grandparent and the grandchild, but rather between the grandparents and their grown children. This is not to suggest that blame rests on one or the other but brings up problems that need to be addressed even if there is no grandchild involved.Dealing with an adult child is not always easy. Patterns that were established early on still resonate. It is hard to break old parent-child relationships. In today's society with economic pressures, many adult children return home and revert back to early patterns as do their parents. Family relationships are never easy.Both of us are parents of adult children and we realize the difficulty of loving too little or too much. As early childhood specialists we have led many groups for parents of young children. Now we realize how much skill it takes to communicate effectively with adult children.Therefore we are now offering a workshop series addressing many situations which may arise. Some of the topics we will talk about are:Your "Baby" as a Competent Adult - Fostering IndependenceNot Playing the Blame GameKeeping the Channels of Communication Open - It's Never too Late!The Difference in Parenting Daughters and SonsSibling Rivalry - It Never EndsLiving Your Own Life and Letting Them Live TheirsWe welcome your ideas, comments and input. Please keep checking our blog and our new Facebook page @ www.facebook.com/educatedgrandparent for updates and workshops.